Favorite We are our Daughter’s First Guru

As I witness my daughter growing into a woman and all that that means, I deeply ponder on how do we as mothers give them the greatest possibility of truly loving themselves in a culture that still heavily undermines and undervalues almost all things feminine.

How do we insulate our daughters against the over sexualization and objectification of women?
How do we help them know their deepest worth, live true to their passions and be bold in their greatest expression of their wild freedom in a society that demands conformity and energetic slavery?
How do we support them in rooting deep into the wisdom and embodiment of the feminine?

Our journey in the last few generations of women in the west has been to cultivate our freedom and empowerment, to strip away all the conditioning that says feminine means inferior and woman is meant to be enslaved to man and the masculine way of living. We forget sometimes how fresh our freedom is…how deep the residue of patriarchy and misogyny still is within our bones and our blood. We come from a lineage where women have been dominated, controlled, tortured, burned at the stake, raped, bought and sold, disrespected and hardly worshipped let alone truly loved for who we REALLY are as women.

Yes we have made huge strides forward to greater empowerment, equality and freedom for women and girls but there is so much more needed. It has to come all the way down into the roots of the issue which is that it is not just about woman’s freedom but about the recognition of the value of all things feminine in both men and women. A valuing of intuition, emotions, feelings, communication, connectedness, community, nature, wildness, gentleness, empathy, sensitivity, deep bonding, nurturance, primal fierceness, magic, sensuality, mystery and so much more.

I want my daughter to know she has value beyond how beautiful she is and how sexy she appears to someone and yet I know it is important to the feminine to play in the realms of beauty and radiance…that this is part of our embodiment of the divine as women. I just don’t want her to be owned by a culture that defines that experience of beauty in a very narrow way based on making women insecure so we buy all this needless crap to improve ourselves.

I want my daughter to connect deeply with her own authentic sexuality and sexual expression rather than be taught by media what is sexy. That her discovery of sexuality is in flow with her deepest feminine awakening rather than man’s ideas of good sex which honestly is still so overtly yang and disconnected from the greatest pleasure based spiritual awakening that is her birthright.

I want my daughter to trust in her heart and spirit’s guidance…the little feminine whispers of her intuition and the wise sensation messages from her body temple rather than believe rational thinking is the only way to guide her life, to be safe and “make it in the world”.

We as mothers play the most important role for our daughters…we are their first Guru and through our own way of being in our skin and the world we constantly transmit teachings and subtle imprints to them. Are we valuing our own feminine enough or are we still caught up in an over adrenalized, production oriented, competitive, masculine mode of existence? Have we opened ourselves fully to the exploration of what it means to be feminine, to be a Woman?

I know I am still uncovering what it really feels like to live more in my feminine, it is a constant discovery. The raw and real beauty that I am uncovering, the magic realms I am entering, the jewel of a woman that I am discovering within myself is the greatest treasure I could ever find.

This alive, juicy, vibrant, complex, deep feeling, fluid, powerful, dark, mysterious, creative force of a Woman that I am is absolutely the most priceless and precious thing I can share with my daughter. And that is all the more fuel to the fire in our great feminine awakening my friends…

photo by Loren Edward Wheeler


Healing our world thru the union of God/Goddess and the path of Pleasure, Joy and Connection.


I have devoted myself to the healing of the division between the masculine and feminine not only in myself but also in others. I believe that this split, this inner war is what is causing so much suffering in the world and that this is the great illusion of separation we need to let go of. It is time for the veils that keep us from knowing and living true love to be removed.

This quote that I am going to share is from Daniel Odier’s book Desire: The Tantric Path to Awakening. This is one of my Favorite books on Kashmirian Shaivism (reality based ancient Tantra) along with his other book Tantric Quest.

I have been sharing this reading for many years during Puja ceremonies, Tantra circles and classes. Every time I read it I get shivers running thru my whole body and feel such truth to the story. It is time for us to bring the Goddess back to her rightful place~~dancing with her Beloved God~~honored for her sensitivity, her wildness, her compassion, her connectedness, her embodiment, her path of pleasure, her power. I believe that we will only heal this world when we heal this illusory division between women and men, body and spirit, heart and mind. We have been stuck in this illusion of duality and the power struggles that it creates, not to mention the shadows playing out so horribly around our sexuality for thousands of years now.

Time for the unification of God/ Goddess within our own being. The inner marriage, the Holy Union where Shiva and Shakti reunite in joy, love and bliss. We are all the play of Shakti (energy/light) and Shiva (consciousnes)….this is what creation is…every moment the reunion of Shiva Shakti…every pulse the beat of God/Goddesses’ heart giving birth to Love……may we remember and once again recognize that heaven is right here, right now on earth.

“The power of woman finds it’s origin in the legendary (Tantric) tales where it is told that the gods were troubled by the appearance of a giant phallus that set about destroying paradise.

This black stone linga was devastating forests and palaces, boring though lakes, filing down mountains and hills.

The gods launched their armies against him, but no force could bring an end to the situation. Then the powerless gods remembered the Great Goddess whom, out of vanity, they had been ignoring. They went and bowed before her, made amends, and unanimously recognized her supremacy**- on the condition that she put an end to the destructive linga.

So the Great Goddess manifested herself in the sky, took hold of the giant phallus, and slipped him into her, whereupon he experienced such pleasure that his madness was completely pacified.

Since then, it is said in Tantrism that woman represents power and that man incarnates the capacity for wonder, for marvel.”

**I believe the word supremacy is used here in the sense of the ancient tantrics belief that Shakti was power and creative and shiva is consciousness…not in a hierarchy way.**

There are several things that astound me from this ancient tale. The first being that we are currently in a time where it is evident that the world is being destroyed by thousands of years of patriarchy that glorifies violence, competition, greed and the subjigation of women, children and all other creatures and most devastatingly the rape and pillage of our very own Mother. Now please hear me…..this patriachy and misogynistic view is embedded in all of us…men and women. I am not blaming men just calling out a systematic destructive pattern. We have all been raised in a culture that values more masculine qualities and also lives not for today but for some heaven after death and so women are often just as quick to betray our true feminine nature in favor of a rational/linear thinking mind and go get ‘em boys competition. And this has hardened us and brought about generation upon generation of women that are so disconnected from the grace, compassion, creativity and radiance that we hardly even know what it means to be a Living Goddess. This disconnect from the inner sacred feminine in men has also been incredibly painful for men and completely detructive to the dance of love. It is time for us to remember, to move beyond our patterns and traumas, to embrace once again the Divine Mother in us all…..men and women. And most of all it is time to honor, love and respect our precious Mother.

And this leads me to the other part of the tale that amazes me….that the way to end the destruction is thru the path of pleasure….embodied, love infused, pleasure. Not thru more hate, not thru more war and fighting and power grabbing but thru remembering that we are here to Love, to nourish, to grace, to inspire, to forgive, to commune with God in our hearts and our holy temples. To reunite with our Beloved is to make peace with all of who we are and to celebrate our togetherness….God and Goddes united as One.

~ Renee Jeffus

Art by Autumn Skye Morrisson

Our Hunger, Our Vulnerability

“Vulnerability is not about fear, grief and disappointment. It is the birthplace of everything we are hungry for.” ~ Brene Brown

One of the more uncomfortable places to enter fully within my self is my hunger, my desire. To be fully present to the depth of my longing and to take full ownership of my deepest desires. I have become comfortable with my disappointments and grief, profoundly intimate with them…but my hunger, my longing, my desire is still a difficult place to fully enter for sustained periods of time. I am afraid it will be too much, that I will become a mad woman, wild like the animals, uncontrollable and dangerous. The generations of control, suppress, deny, don’t feel have left me at a loss for lasting intimacy with my deepest desires, have me suspicious of them, judging what I want as wrong, guarding myself from myself. And this is the root of disempowerment…that we have all been conditioned to be so untrusting of our own wild, primal, instinctual, intuitive, embodied selves that we need “authorities” to keep us safe, teach us how to live, how to heal, how to act, how to live and even “birth” our babies for us.
I am calling back the untamed wild woman in my bones and in my blood. I am calling back the wise witch in me that knows the earth and her magic. I am calling back the Kali Ma who fiercely fights for truth. I am calling back the earth mama who rides the waves of childbirth in ecstatic oneness with the primordial life force. I am calling back the soul sisters who are ready to stand and sing together to birth a new world. I am calling back the brothers who boldly open their hearts to heal this world. I am calling back love in it’s primal, pure, wild organic pulse…It is time.


Winter Solstice Message

winter-solsticeBeautiful Friends,

It has been some time since I have written since releasing Oasis. I took a much needed break to rejuvenate and deepen with my children and my personal life. I have missed you and all of our beautiful sharing at Oasis but I have been deeply nourishing my deeper dreams and am close to birthing my newest offerings to you and our community and the world. Stay tuned for it is truly revolutionary and powerful and I want YOU to be a part of it!

This past year has been one of profound pain, true joy and endless transformation and it is incredible how when we deepen our heart presence to life it all just gets so much richer and exquisitely beautiful. I pray that as 2013 comes to completion that you have dove into your authentic life just a little bit more and are living more deeply rooted in the juiciness of YOU!

Keep an eye out for my upcoming offerings that I will be unveiling over the next few weeks and I would be absolutely delighted to continue to support you in your full blooming and empowerment!

Many blessings for these holy days and see below for two wonderful opportunities to come and dance with me this weekend here in Ashland.

Infinite gratitude for such an amazing year!

With so much love,

Renee Jeffus